Wolverine and Kintsugi

Ebb and flow are part of life cycle. All have heard, read, seen but when the ebbs are felt, off the many who face it, those who come out are few. Why is it so? In game of life, while hearing, seeing and talking about this could be considered as easier levels of difficulty, feeling and going through it is different level of difficulty. 

When difficult times hit, there are two types of behavior that people portray from the way they respond:

1. Some are astute and resilient.
2. Some succumb, give up, get into depression or suicide.

The astute and resilient see solution to negativity is confidence in goodness, courage in acceptance and wisdom in seeing things as they are. This attitude lets them spring out of the situation which is seen as abyss by those who succumb and fall into depression. The astute who are generally victorious in wading the situation feel that what Wolverine feels when pain is felt. "The pain lets you know you're still alive. The battle isn't around you, it is within you". The astute suit themselves for occasion and outgrow when needed. The astute becomes Wolverine.

On the other spectrum who succumb should know that the fear of uncertainty is the killer. We all go to sleep with hope that we would wake up in morning. When we face this event which is the most uncertain fearless and with faith, shouldn't the question be why fear about any other uncertainty? Since we all face the most uncertain with faith aren't we all wolverines?

In one of the opening scenes in Bollywood Movie Pathan, Shah Rukh Khan, an exiled RAW agent discusses with his ex-boss Dimple Kapadia to help start an organization with team of ex-RAW agents. In their conversation there is mention of a Japanese word Kintsugi. It was something new and made me look for this word. Kintsugi which means "to join with gold" is an ancient Japanese art done by adding lacquer and powdered gold to broken pottery which makes the repaired pottery much more beautiful and valuable. The process usually takes months. This artwork shows how to embrace and find strength in imperfection with patience. 

If those who feel like succumbing to situation when an ebb hits them, face it with an attitude of wolverine and handle it with skill of kintsugi would sure bring out the best in them. Humans have lived ages and the progress made and seen are by the Wolverines with Kintsugi, who never give up and are patient. Humans have that mantle in them, if not would not have been able to come out of natural disasters, pandemics, social unrests, anarchy. Persistence and faith are the core values of such people. A belief that there is always a solution to every problem. Deep down they keep telling themselves, I didn't come this far to come this far only. 

The more people we have with Wolverine attitude and Kintsugi skill the mental wellbeing of society would be at bliss. Probably a way to utopian world.

Seed I planted

 Ever felt cheated, back stabbed, a feeling of deceit when you had an idea and shared that to someone and they claimed the credit for it? You were supposed to be the one crowned. For example, it could be an optimization initiative for the organization that you happen to share with your colleague. Sly as a fox, he brings it up to management, takes credit and hits to fame. In kaliyuga all would have been through such encounter in some form.

Under such situation anger seeps in followed by disappointment and dejection. These negative feelings sink hard into oneself and begin to question the journey we are in. Mind starts to ponder was it worth the time and effort? As it was your idea, this question transforms into a palpable sense of thought. The foundation of self-esteem is shaken leading to lower self-efficacy. If left unattended this might lead into Why Me Syndrome and what not newer psychological terms out there to perplex you. Your condition is exemplifying for these newer psychological terms and tend to push you for therapy sessions. The moment you wear a victim tee shirt you are permitting circumstances and others to decide your destination.

Rosalind Franklin vs James Watson and Francis Crick were scientists in race for understanding the molecular structure of nucleic acids where the latter duo was awarded Nobel prize for Medicine in 1962. Rosalind was only accredited posthumously. Another such example is invention of radio which we know as Marconi while the original invention was done by Tesla. There are many such unsung heroes. 

Under such circumstances following the concept of Seed I planted will calm the mind. The mind must see it like a seed been planted by one of our forefathers for the tree which bears fruits that they will not taste. Credit, fame are the wants of conscious self. Nobel Laureate Rabindranath Tagore mentioned "The one who plants trees knowing that he will never sit in their shade, has at least started to understand the meaning of life."

Focusing on the intent of the initiative rather on the outcome benefit claim works to heal the set back. Rosalind and Tesla didn't wear victim tee shirt and had probably told to themselves about the Seed I Planted concept and continued their journey. 

In 2010 comedian actor Vivek had launched the Green Globe movement and planted over 3.3million saplings until his demise. Today he is not alive to take any further credit and might go to others, but the act he initiated will live forever as grown trees.  

For those who are still unable to sleep well due to such untoward incident may further handle the situation as mentioned by Thiruvalluvar in Thirukural 630th verse " இன்னாமை இன்பம் எனக்கொளின் ஆகுந்தன் ஒன்னார் விழையுஞ் சிறப்பு". It translates to; when you show the grit to take pain as pleasure your esteem with enemy will elevate. Channel the creative energy in constructive ways and let it not get buried with you. Rosalind went on to work on RNA structure. She glowed as Gold when flamed. It took 40years for Watson to admit Rosalind's role in the discovery. Be strong as a bull and charge forward.       

From now on if it is your idea and credit go to someone else take it with a mindset of So What, that was a Seed I planted. Tell yourself that your idea lives and continue your stride with pride. You will be destined to do better and greater good, as "Give, and it will be given to you...for the measure you give will be measure you get back." Luke 6:38

#seediplanted, #thirukural, #rosalindfranklin, #jameswatson, #vivek, #tesla, #luke6:38, #whymesyndrome

Mental wellbeing through living spaces

According to world bank in 2019 over 55.7% of world population is living in urban cities and expected to increase over 68% by 2050. The growing urban population challenges architects to design living spaces that can accommodate more within available less urban area. Going vertical with smaller living spaces is on rise to meet this demand.

This trend is compounded by the less time which urbaners spend in homes. Keeping oneself busy at office indirectly reflects less time at home. Eating or buying out food requires less cooking space. These add up conveniently for an architect to think why need a big living space. But little do we understand the long term impact these small living spaces have on human life. Constrained space indirectly leads to constrained thinking and restrained cognition over time. "We shape our buildings and afterwards our buildings shape us", Winston Churchill.

Many people sharing small spaces are made to absorb each other vibes. This could be felt easily when taking a crowded train, the mood of the people around impacts the way you feel. We become and act like a pressure cooker with built up stress. Walking stress bombs. These vibes affect our mood. According to Jim Rohn, motivational speaker "You are the average of five people you spend the most time with".  With same people around over period that too confined in small spaces subconsciously alters behavior. Numerous studies have shown this and deduce that people living in smaller spaces tend to have increased mental disorders such as schizophrenia, depression and chronic anxiety. Children talking about stress, depression, rise in people seeking therapies for mental disorders are facts that none can deny which infer there is risk of mental wellbeing.

 Smaller living spaces will be there as long as population migrate to urban cities. Therefore instead of visiting therapists as after effect, mental wellbeing is required to prevent these effects. Pound the living spaces with more positive vibrations such as melodious music, devotional songs, motivational speeches, inspirational movies, comedies so that they absorb positivity and give back more. You become what you consume. With work from home a new norm, spend more time at home. Bond and laugh more with family. Cook and eat at home. Make the house a home and the home shall lead one to a mentally sound aged life.

#smalllivingspace, #workfromhome, #restrainedcognition, #positivevibrations, #mentalwellbeing

COVID-19: Time-out of Rat race

We, the citizens of the world, participate relentlessly in rat races to unreachable destinations. Once part of it, the whole is plunged into it. The need for the race is incomprehensible but primarily for money, power, luxuries. In short to uphold the social animal position in the name of happiness.

Historically it is evident that, at crucial juncture's God cautions human on aberrant behavior by various means. Provides time out to re-align our paths from such behavior. Could the recent COVID-19 outbreak be one such warning? If it is, this timeout could be for various reasons. We ain't saints. 

To me it is time for self-reflection. In a world of lost identities it is now that we have been given a chance to re-define and re-sculpt our self. With countries under lock-down, more time is available to most of us than ever to re-think our visions and goals. A moment to reflect, understand and align with the purpose of life. By the process of re-sculpting self, some might even opt out of the race for their soul to live and travel in peace.

The virus is at large and does scare most, but on a positive note use this time-out provided to find ways in understanding our soul's better, re-connect with purpose and help in its journey. Ask yourself if you still need to be in the race? COVID-19 timeout is a time to re-think, re-align, re-define, re-sculpt, re-set, re-ignite. 

A short video on happiness https://youtu.be/e9dZQelULDk

Real you in YOU - 2; Losing identity in finding uniqueness.

 Minority cultures and communities are getting drifted from their origins due to cultural appropriation. Survival of minorities act as multiplier in increasing the rate of drift, helping the appropriation from other end of losing their identity. In the process minority cultures adopt dominant cultures inappropriately. Embracing cultural, religious traditions of dominant cultures as fashion statements, symbols, songs has become common. This gives them a euphoric feeling of achievement, uniqueness among their community.

 Appreciating and embracing other cultures and practices is humanity value that has to be passed on to generations. However one is ignoramus and mocks the culture when patronizing other cultural practices without knowing the in-depth reasons. It is cultural misappropriation.

Continuing to do so will push one into a zone of confusion called #whoyouare and lead to extinction of minority cultures. And the individual belonging to the minority community becomes a pseudonym in the mush. Ultimately it will be a flight taken off heading nowhere; mislead journey of life. In psychiatric terms all such individuals are in #identitycrisis.

To avoid such psychological pitfall, go find the #realyouinyou where by one need not compromise their identity that was provided by birth. Such identity are god given; live with it and die with it. Dont' change it. There are better things to be changed in life.

Real you in YOU

It is estimated that more than 108 billion people have lived in earth. Each one of us are the currently living 7.7 billion. We might be alike with few fellow human beings in some aspects but research has proven no two humans are alike, even identical twins are unique to their own. Still not knowing this; the breathing mantra of most today is #BeUnique. This seems to be accepted as to have been achieved by:

1. Wearing the newest design or 
2. Carrying a designer collection or 
3. Using the latest gadget or
4. Driving a limited edition car etc.,

Need for credit, appreciation, recognition all ignites a wanting desire to stand out of that sheep stock. Are we heading in right direction of showing our uniqueness? 

"THE MORE YOU LIKE YOURSELF, THE LESS YOU ARE LIKE ANYONE ELSE, WHICH MAKES YOU UNIQUE." - Walt Disney

Finding the #realyouinyou is what makes you unique. The real you is what makes you being one among the 7.7 billion lives but still unique from others on earth. Loving yourself will enable to fine Purpose of life, which could be a way to call the real unique. Japanese term the purpose of being as #Ikigai (a reason for being).

Most are caught in fulfilling the daily roller coaster life of picks and chooses, needs and wishes in which failing to find our ikigai. Unfulfilled desires steer us in endless loop of autopilot that which creates a #illusionofhappiness. By entangled in this spiral we fail to value the things and people around us. Some get enlightened at their twilight ages and regret. Wouldn't that be too late? The most common regret when asked dying people is "I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true on myself, not the life others expected of me". 

Guiding Millennial generation that their uniqueness is not defined by what they wear and carry, but in finding the #realyouinyou will make humans find their Ikigai and allow future dying soul's rest in peace. 

HuDiSlav

The perception power of mind is powerful that, through it we channel our thoughts in an optimistic or pessimistic track. It is where unconscious and subconscious supersede conscious. Shakespeare said "There is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so". Minds are like parachute, they function only when open. When we receive information our mind seeks help from stereo-typed memories/registers that has been generated in our mind by our experiences. This is perception. A chain reaction of stereo- typing, called Ceiling Effects are created within our mind that does not allow it to open beyond the boundary formed by stereo-typing.

According to Winston Churchill "The price of greatness is responsibility over each of your thoughts". When such is the seriousness, mind seeks comfort by handling things that are familiar. It gets into cozy corner by knowing that its ideas are reinforced or are close to it. This gives it satisfaction and achievement, an "Eureka" sensation. Perceptions are guiding force for mind. The Eureka sensation has become more convenient with technology advancement. It provides short term wins, like a spurts of ecstasy.

Three Stages of Human Mind

Information received travels in split second, and human mind rushes to comprehend and reinforce through perception before making conclusions and decisions. When mixed information is received; it has to be matured enough to analyse and filter to separate them as good or bad / need or discard / authentic or fake. Cognitive ability has to be well developed for such analysis. Millennial generation youngsters and Alpha Generation kids are maturing faster than the previous generations, however their minds are still young and wet clay, hence could be molded improper if not guided appropriately. A key challenge that parent's face today in guiding their children is reliability & wise use of technology. According to Gordon Neufeld, a prominent Vancouver psychologist “Intuitively, we know that if we’re coercive, we’re going to get resistance.” When youngsters look for quick answers “You need a strong alpha presentation to inspire a child to trust you and depend upon you", if not they seek technology, where they are flooded with information. Data Overload.

Data Overload

Industrial Revolution was answer to Physical labor limitation; Cognitive limitation is becoming overcome in the current age of Information Revolution. This is disrupting everything. Disruptive Technology is the buzz word of day. Every global citizen is in one way or other disrupted by the fast evolving Information Revolution. Politicians and Economists are evaluating the impact. While the focus is more towards economic aspect; the impact it has on society is more to be worried about.

Google estimates 30exabytes (300 followed by 18 zeros) of data created by humans that is available in internet. This is more data than humans have created in previous 5000 years. "Alavuku Minjinal Amirthamum Nanju..." (even elixir turns poisonous when taken in excess) goes a Tamil saying. Every day there is bombardment with Gigabytes if not Megabytes of data. Sometimes same content has ironical information. For examples some websites publish chocolate causes pimples and another says its helps to reduce while another says it has no impact. If not guided correctly they will perceive wrong information and reaffirm those as their belief system. Once it gets seeded in their minds it becomes tough to unlearn. This data overload has serious impact on humans as individuals and humanity as a society.

Human mind takes two kind of decision making process. A Conscious one and Adaptive Unconscious one. The latter was a term coined by Daniel Wagner in 2002. Mind tunes it's adaptive unconscious decision making capabilities to ease and help to make faster conscious decisions. For tuning better adaptive unconscious decisions, there is need for better rational cognition, which comes from knowledge and experience. While Millennials and Alpha Generation are looking for quicker outcomes, too much information with less rational cognition leads to incorrect adaptive unconscious decisions.

Harmonious We

Other effect of data overload is at the other end of the spectrum, nurturing. When Nature (genetic) has a impact on the growth of the kid, nurturing has larger impact on them in today context. Thanks to technology, it targets mind at the wrong point. Mind gets attracted towards negative faster than positive, it is law of attraction. As is the role of the parent's to guide their children in developing their cognitive process, equally is that of those who post and forward information on the web. It is moral responsibility of each one of those who who upload data to web as they can make an positive or negative impact on the readers especially younger ones. Seeing this the current generation can equally grow up as morally responsible global citizens.

While it is good that governments and businesses are keen in making the workforce adapt to the fast changing trend; there seem to be less focus on the communal aspect of it. Data overload makes the Alpha Generation children and Millennial Generation youngsters rely less on their cognitive abilities, analyzing capability and rely more on information readily available on net without validating. These make them Confused; Indecisive; Unproductive; affected by Attention Deficit Trait (ADT) ultimately lowering performance and creativity. This might end innovation drive and make humans susceptible to digital slavery. Such individuals form more self-inclined principles.

Due to such individual traits; the future generations are forming into a Tumultuous Me Society where:-

1) Inhibited learning ability due to lack of relevant feedback

2) Increased Self-interested people

3) Relationship issues

4) Unable to embrace differences amicably

Information overload and ten ways to handle

Break Free

As with all advancements that mankind has seen, technology is two sided. If youngsters are not guided and taught to use it in the right way they can end up in a way that will nurture Human Digital Slaves in short HuDiSlav^TM who form a Tumultuous Me society. In the whirlwind of Data Overload, those who synthesis it for necessary information intelligently and smartly will be able to make responsible netizens. Parents should be aware of the subliminal role of adaptive unconscious decision making side of mind psyche and its effect on their kids. They should focus on the ten ideas given in infographic and guide their children appropriately. This that will allow such netizens to break from Digital Slavery and form a Harmonious We Society.

Perception-2

Mind seeks comfort by handling things easier. It gets into cozy corner by knowing that its ideas are reinforced or are close to it. This gives it satisfaction and achievement, an "Eureka" sensation. Perceptions are guiding force for mind. The Eureka sensation has become more convenient with technology advancement. It provides short term wins, like a spurts of ecstasy.

Information travels in split of second, transfers in both good and bad ways and might reinforce one's perception in two ways.

1. Making their perceptions reinforced for good and as well bad reasons

2. Giving good and bad ideas that might not have been thought before (this is dangerous as might aide developing criminal minds)

When mind encounters mixed information it has to be matured enough to analyse and filter to separate the good & bad. Cognitive ability has to be well developed for such analysis. Y and Millennial generation are maturing faster than the previous generations, however their minds are still young and wet clay, hence could be molded inappropriately if not guided appropriately. The difficulty parents face today in guiding their children is reliability & wise use of technology. Kids look for quick answers and when parents are unable to answer their questions are termed unreliable and they seek technology, where they are flooded with information. Sometimes same content has ironical information. For examples some websites publish chocolate causes pimples and another says its helps to reduce while another says it has no impact.  If not guided correctly they will perceive wrong information and reaffirm those as their belief system. Once it gets seeded in their minds it becomes tough to unlearn.

Other effect of  information flood is at the other end of the spectrum, nurturing. When Nature (genetic) has a impact on the growth of the kid, nurturing has larger impact on them in today context. Thanks to technology, it targets mind at the wrong point. Mind gets attracted towards negative faster than positive, it is law of attraction. As is the role of the parents to guide their children in developing their cognitive process, equally is that of those who post and forward information on the web. It is moral responsibility of each one of those who who upload data to web as they can make an positive or negative impact on the readers especially younger ones. Seeing this the current generation can equally grow up as morally responsible global citizens. As with all advancements that mankind has seen, technology is two sided. If not guided and taught to be used in the right way it can end up in a way that will make us repent in future. Let us get help to get their perceptions right.

Perception

 Shakespeare said "There is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so". How true isn't it? The most hated enemy of one is the most loving person to another. The perception power of mind is such that it is how we channel our thoughts in an optimistic or pessimistic track. 1.4kg weighing human brain which is the thought center holds the key to success or failure. It is how we react to situations and people that determines end result.

 A famous saying goes "Minds are like parachute, they function only when open". When we perceive we get help from stereo typing that has been generated in our mind by our experiences. A chain reaction of stereo typing, called ceiling effects are created within our mind that does not allow it to open beyond the boundary formed by stereo typing.

Winston Churchill said "The price of greatness is responsibility over each of your thoughts".  Let our perceptions guide us but not rule us when we face situations and people.

New Year Resolution

2010 is about to become past and 2011 is around the corner. Believe most of them are ready to make their new year resolutions. Are they the usual quitting smoking/alcohol, reducing weight/junk food, excersice regularly? Nothing wrong though but I was wondering why are new year resolutions always about quitting or reducing, which are mostly self centered. Why not make resolutions that are something different like:

1. Help the needy by possible means
2. Cut down carbon waste by recycling or using less fossil fuels
3. Spread more of what I know to others
4. Act more kindly where possible
5. Keep cool, to reduce friction with others

These are few that came to my mind as resolutions in a different perspective. These might or might not be applicable to all, but the thought that runs in my mind is why not try to make resolutions that are not purely self centered?

The above few or similar if made as resolutions will be practiced because when the humand mind hears a no or stop it always thinks why not and will rebel, its hard wired in the every human. However these resolutions do not ask one to stop any of what is being done at present. Therefore these resolutions if made are more likely to be followed. This also acts as a motivating factor which helps to build self esteem.

Making non-self centered resolutions are most likely to prevail not only through the coming 2011 but also for the years to come as these resolutions become the new norm as one starts to practice that not only benefit the one making the resolution but also those surrounding the individual. Moreover these kind of resolutions could be contagious too, which is good news for the society that we live in...Therefore shall we?

Good Habits

Some may wonder how only few people become successful? Are they gifted with some talents? or are they extrodinary? This is not true. Every individual has an talent hidden within themself and it depends on the individual to identify it to become successful. I believe every individual is given atleast an oppurtunity in life when utilised in proper way paves way to success. Key to success is discipline along with good habits.

I came across the book 7 Good Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey and would like to just point out those habits.

1. Be Proactive
2. Begin with an end in the mind (Suppose this is the toughest of all)
3. Put first things first
4. Think of Win-Win deal
5. To understand and then be understood (Put the I at last)
6. Creative Co-operation or Synergise
7. Self Renewal or Sharpening the saw

The best way to implement this is not memorzing the above, as life is not an exam but is a lesson,.... so first to Learn it & then Practice it.

I do really believe that by practising the above every individual can become a successful person. These habits would also groom a person to be better and effective in the society. All the best for your successful future.